How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
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