Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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