apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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