oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize
