he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Randomize