shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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