I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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