I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
