omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
