i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
