You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
mondays should just be called national damage control day
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Randomize
