Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Randomize
