worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
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