if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Randomize
