I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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