bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Randomize
