I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Randomize
