I'm gonna have a badass scar
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
