I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
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