Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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