you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
We are two peas in an std pod
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize
