I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
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