My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
