That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Randomize
