The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Randomize
