Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
