Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
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