you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
