Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize