bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
This can only be settled by a dance off.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
