4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Randomize
