butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
