So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Randomize
