You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Randomize
