i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
