Well apparently he's into motor boating.
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
