...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
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