the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
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