I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Randomize
