You're my little dorito
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
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