Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
