never play flip cup with pint glasses
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Randomize