These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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