Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
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