WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize