any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
He? As in you personified your dick?
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
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