Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
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