if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
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