I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
