Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Randomize
